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Breaking up is hard to do!

January 30, 2011

Dear Left-over Chocolate Cake,

I hate you.  Ok, I don't hate you, I love you.  Which is why I hate you.  You sit there on the counter barely wrapped in plastic.  You don't even have the decency to properly cover yourself.  I wish you were never baked!

P.S... I see you have been hanging out with that fork again.  Every time I look at you,  that fork is hanging out on your dish.  I think this is the main cause for our problems

Sincerely,
The Hockey Wife

Dear Snow,

I hate you.  Ok, I don't hate you, but lately you have become so needy.  I cannot always stop what I am doing and shovel you every time you pile up.  I didn't want to have to tell you this, but you have overstayed your welcome.  Please melt!

P.S... I think it is best we spend time apart.  Maybe next year I will be ready to see you again.

Yours Truly,
The Hockey Wife

Dear Red Wine,

I hate you.  Ok, I don't hate you, I hate what you do to me.  It is like drinking with Jekyll and Hyde!  One moment you make me feel so good, and then the next morning I don't even recognize you.  I cannot take the headaches, nausea, and exhaustion you cause.  What is that?  You have heard this all before?  You think I will come running back to you?  This time I am serious.  It is over!

P.S.  Please wear your best label tonight, we have company coming over!

Cheers,
The Hockey Wife
Dear Hockey Game,

I hate you.  Ok, I don't hate you, I hate what you have become.  We used to have fun together.  I would often dress up and look forward to seeing you.  But things have changed between us, you don't seem to understand that.  I know you are the same game; sixty minutes, three periods, and two intermissions...but I am not the same girl as when we met.  I now have children.  I have new priorities, and you have to be placed on the bottom of the list.  I hope you understand.  I am sure we will always have a connection, whether I am there or not.

P.S... It's not you, it's me!

Best of Luck,
The Hockey Wife

9 comments:

Nicole said...

I love reading things like this! They make me giggle and smile :)

lindsey said...

I love this!!
I am set to make chocolate brownies today and as I walk by them just sitting on the counter I will most likely sneak bites. Oh the joys!
Have an awesomesauce Monday!

posidanielle said...

Love your little breakup letters! Such a great idea! I am breaking up with the snow too! I despise it! (Well i think its pretty but it is just a disaster waiting to happen!) haha. I hope you have a wonderful day!

No. 7 said...

Very creative, i love this post. I get every single letter too, especially the break-up with red wine. Ugh.
Thanks for stopping by No. 7. I did grow up in NY - right outside NYC and also QBY/LG. Graduated from QBY HS. Did you spend time there for hockey or did you grow up there too? This is odd...the bad boy I referred to in my post was a hockey player. :)

Alida said...

Love this!! You brightened my day!! LOL

The Hockey Wife said...

No. 7....

I am familiar with Lake George..so of course I know Martha's. Not all Hockey players are bad boys...I think?

Shalyn said...

This is my first time visiting your blog- you are too funny, I love these letters! The chocolate cake one is my fave- I am having a similar battle with Oreos right now.

Bobbi said...

lol! I was stopping by to see if you wanted to come on over to FTLOB and chat sometime. Let me know BJ

Missy said...

I found you through FTLB and glad I did!
Hahahaha!!! I love how you called the snow 'needy' for it wanting to be shovelled up everyday! Next time I see snow I will think of you I'm sure. Nothing like some personification to make me smile!