When I was pregnant for the first time...I read all the required books to prepare for the birth of our daughter!
I consulted this book for every little thing that I felt, heard, and thought I needed. I would try to only read the chapters that correlated with my pregnancy week by week...but I would secretly read ahead so I would of course "know what to expect"...just like the title implied!
Now I probably should have consulted the What to Eat When You're Expecting since I managed to gain over sixty pounds while pregnant with my daughter! Oops!
Soon it was time to start preparing my hospital bag...which included everything I was going to need in the hospital before, during and after the birth of our child. Since this was my first child, I assumed I needed each and every item on this list (found here).
If you look closely at the list, there is a section for clothes that you MUST have for your delivery! Now remember, this was my first child...and I was not quite fitting into anything from about my 4th month of pregnancy and beyond. This included my (pre-child) underwear!
Clothes
- Extra pairs of underwear suitable for wearing with maxi-pads (no thongs, in other words) and a nursing bra
- Nightgown or pj's, socks, and slippers
- Comfortable outfit to head home in (remember you'll still look six months pregnant, so plan accordingly)
- Going-home outfit for baby (don't forget socks or booties and a receiving blanket, plus extra layers if it's cold). Bring along a few diapers, although the hospital will probably provide them.
It was time to hit the local Target and pick up some comfortable underwear that would provide coverage from top to bottom...and sea to shining sea! (Let's just say my extra sixty pounds was not just in my belly!
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Your grandma called...she wants her panties back! |
I grabbed a (much) larger size than I would usually have needed and looked at the package...
Why do they always have to have skinny models...even when the product calls for women with curves? This is NOT what I looked like in these Hanes 100% cotton "No ride up" panties! But it must have been my lucky day, because marked on my package of five pairs ofgranny panties...was a special offer!
Why do they always have to have skinny models...even when the product calls for women with curves? This is NOT what I looked like in these Hanes 100% cotton "No ride up" panties! But it must have been my lucky day, because marked on my package of five pairs of
BONUS PAIR OF PANTIES INCLUDED!
So what if I was purchasing underwear in a package of five (you don't find those deals at Victoria's Secret)! Who needs cool colors...white underwear was practical and could be bleached! So what if I was purchasing underwear that at one time could have held two of my behinds....I was getting a free pair of underwear!
I was so excited...I went home and cut open my package and pulled out my BONUS panties, and they were...a size extra-small!
What The F*CK? They put a pair of extra-small bikini underpants in my package of extra-large white cotton granny panties? Well I guess it made since to someone at the Hanes factory. Since both pairs of underwear were on the same skinny model...they must fit everyone!
QUESTION - Why do we say a PAIR of underwear...if there is only one undergarment?