It Was One of Those Days!

The other day I was doing a quick grocery shop before I had to pick my children up from school...and it was one of those days. I rushed around picking up the needed groceries...milk, apples, and feminine products. Remember, I said it was one of those days!

I entered the checkout stand and waited my turn.  Usually, I take this time to catch up on important reading...

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But today something else caught my eye...I found myself staring right at a Wunderbar!  (For those of you in the United States and beyond, a Wunderbar is a chocolate bar in Canada that makes me salivate just thinking about it!)

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This was a complete impulse buy...as I am usually quite controlled when checking out.  Just ask my children how many times I buy candy while we are in the checkout lane!  NEVER!  However today was one of those days, and I was not in control.  I immediately had a conversation in my mind between the person who would like to lose 10 pounds by this summer, and the bloated person who had cramps, a pimple on her chin, and what some would call irritability!  

I would like to share the dialogue I had running through my mind.  (Healthy-me will be written in red, while PMS-me will be written in blue.) 

"Oh, a Wunderbar...that sounds really good right now"

"Do you know how many calories are in a Wunderbar?"

"When was the last time you had a Wunderbar...you have earned one!"

"Swimsuit season is coming, and you still have 10 pounds to lose"

"There is still two feet of snow on the ground...you have plenty of time to lose the weight!"

"It is not worth it, it is just the PMS talking...Oh look at that, George Clooney's girlfriend has cellulite!"

"Don't distract her with tabloids...TAKE THE WUNDERBAR!!

I am not a person who deals well with conflict, so I grabbed the Wunderbar (against my will) and threw it on the belt.  Besides, it was one of those days!

I stood there, still listening to a distant voice in my mind talking about calories, disappointment, guilt, blah, blah blah...I tuned her out as I paid for my groceries and started skipping walking out of the store.  I was about half way to my car when I looked at the five full bags of groceries and realized I didn't know what bag my Wunderbar was in!  

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"WHERE THE HECK IS MY WUNDERBAR!" was all I could scream at the top of my lungs!!

OK, I didn't really scream this out loud, but I sure wanted too!  How could that cashier be so clueless?  Do they not learn in cash-register school that a woman purchasing a chocolate bar while waiting in line to check out...is doing so under pure duress?  Do they not know that they should ask the woman (discreetly, as not to draw attention) if she would like the chocolate so she can place it in her purse?  This should be a universal rule...OFFER THE CHOCOLATE!

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I was a little late picking up my daughter, as it took a little bit of time to completely empty three grocery bags and reload them.  But in the end, as I sat in my car and inhaled ate my Wunderbar...I knew I had made the correct choice, because it was just one of those days!

Question...Do you have a special "something" for one of those days?

{Not Quite} a Kitchen Makeover...

I have mentioned before (here) that I like to escape to the bathtub when I need a little break from motherhood, wifehood, and cleaning-hood!  There is nothing more relaxing to me than a hot bath and a little magazine reading.

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Usually I read celebrity gossip magazines.  Even though I feel bad for the poor celebrities being hounded by paparazzi, I am part of the reason the paparazzi are employed.  I secretly have a desire to see celebrity cellulite!

Now I say usually, but lately I have been reading Chatelaine magazine (see here) because I like to help out students who have been asked to sell magazine subscriptions at school.  As much as I would prefer a good chocolate bar...in the long run, I love getting a new magazine every month!

Anyhow...I was soaking in the tub the other night and I was reading my latest magazine when I came across the current Chatelaine Contest.  They were giving away a $25, 000 Kitchen Makeover.

Enter for a Chance to WIN Your Dream Kitchen from Chatelaine and IKEA!

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Are you interested?  Then go ahead and click here and enter your information!!  However, I don't want to burst your "Dream Kitchen" bubble...but GOOD F*CKING LUCK!

To enter the contest you are asked to submit in 250 words or less...what's not working in your kitchen, and what's on your wish list for improving it!  They also ask for a picture of your kitchen...

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Imagine the above kitchen is yours...and you send in a letter describing the yellow counters, bad cabinets and possible lack of plumbing(?)... all within 250 words or less.  You send them the photo, and you are sure you must have the WORST kitchen around!  You wait for the call...

While you are waiting, I want to ask you a question....Did you read the fine print?  Because I did, and it made me realize this was not your simple contest giveaway!!

Contest closes March 31, 2011.  Must be a Canadian resident over the age of majority in their province or territory of residence, excluding Quebec.  One entry per person.  Full rules and entry at www.chatelaine.com/dreamkitchen.  Odds of winning depend upon number of eligible entries received.  Mathematical skill-testing question must be correctly answered to win.  No purchase necessary.

Do you see that?  You have to answer a mathematical question correctly to win!  WHAT???  How does a math skill-test qualify you for a Dream Kitchen giveaway?

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So after writing your 250 word essay, and waiting, the phone finally rings!  Congratulations, you have won the Chatelaine Dream Kitchen Contest!!  However...you need to take a quick quiz.

Since you have not been in school for the last twenty years, and you never really cared for math in the first place...you take home a consolation prize.

At least it matches your kitchen counters!

  Question...Do you read the fine print? Can anyone solve the math question? 

A Hockey Kiss of Death...

In hockey, there is a certain day that can wreak havoc on an already unstable lifestyle....

THE TRADE DEADLINE

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I would like to share with you a few examples of things that can boost the chance that a player will be traded (not just for lack of points, team chemistry, salary cap, etc.)...

Think of it as THE HOCKEY KISS OF DEATH!

A player will most-likely be traded...

• The player has purchased, in bulk, spaghetti, tomato sauce, and chicken breasts from Costco!

• The player has been chosen to pose for the cover on the next month's issue of the team program. (This happened one season on my husband's team...the team program always had a player on the cover who had been traded before the issue came out.)

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• The player has been told to find permanent housing (for us, it is buying a home)

These are from my husband...when I asked him about {rumored} 'kiss of deaths' in the hockey world...

• The player finally gets around to dropping off his dry-cleaning.

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• The player only packs one suit for a road trip.  (Then is sent to a new team from the road).

• The goalie finally gets his mask painted with the team logo.

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This one is my favorite...

• The player finally finds a regular "booty call"!

um, ok babe...what ever you say!

**UPDATE....I have had some great additions, and I wanted to be sure to post them!**

Thank you to KY at Travel Babbles  

• The guy's girlfriend or family books a flight to come see them mid-season. Bam, kiss, goodbye!

Thank you to the Hockey Wife

• A wife or girlfriend does not understand that it is NEVER smart to talk poorly of the organization that signs the paychecks!  

Anyone else want to add to the list?  What is the kiss of death for a hockey player to be traded?